Kelley Counseling and Wellness

Intention With 2017 right around the corner, New Year’s resolutions are a frequent topic of conversation. I have heard many clients, friends, and family members talking about ways they hope to better themselves in the year to come. One theme I have noticed has been, “be more intentional and help others”. Intention and controlling the things that one can control is a subject I discuss with clients frequently. Not only in terms of their own actions and the impact on their lives, but also in terms of modeling healthy behavior for their children.   Teaching kids from an early age that, while they may be small, they can still make thoughtful, intentional decisions gives them a stronger, healthier sense of self. We can further aid the healthy development of a child’s sense of self by empowering them to help others. This not only shows them the impact they can have, even when they are not yet adults, but also helps them become more connected to their community. None of us live...

Enough Here is a reminder for anyone that may be struggling right now. You are enough.  It is important to remember that you have to give yourself credit for what you ARE  doing, as opposed to thinking negatively about what you are not doing.   If we focus completely on the negatives of our situations, it may feel like we are never good enough, never pretty enough, never smart enough, never happy enough, etc.  However, this is all relative, and measured based on opinion.   When thinking about Gardner's Theory of Multiple Intelligences  (see more here ), one can see that there are so many different ways to be "smart".  So, to assume that you are not smart because you score highly on musical intelligence as opposed to logical-mathematical, is simply a matter of opinion and what you place value in.  We must learn to recognize our own strengths and see the positives within ourselves, and not compare outwardly to the strengths of oth...

Let’s face it. It’s easy to get distracted, even when around people that we care about. Yet, the ability to be present while with your spouse, family, or even at work can be a critical skill to maintain relationships and get the most out of each moment. To be present, is to be grounded in the moment and aware of yourself and the world around you.  It denotes a sense of intentionality and commitment to whatever is in front of you, be that a person, a task, or a cup of tea. In this sense, it is the opposite of being distracted. Imagine you are telling someone something very important and suddenly they start looking at their phone while saying, “Um-humm,” in response to everything you say. That might paint an exaggerated picture, but how many times have we all been “listening” to someone only to be thinking about multiple things at the same time? Often, this is not intentional. It’s been a long day, there are projects that need completing, bills that need paying, and your 7 y...